Sometime Last Week

Do you remember when I was so, so mad on Thursday? I was sitting in a computer lab on campus. I was working on homework, chatting a little, blogging a lot, trying to be funny. Do you remember this? Then in the middle of the afternoon I received an email. I stared at the screen, my eyes left-to-righting words of a message I was so, so confident I wouldn’t receive. I read them again, and the words blurred as tears welled over my pupils. I thought I had a chance. I thought I had a good chance. A damn good chance. But they showed me; they stuck it to me. My good-enoughness went back onto the balance, and it doesn’t have enough weight. It doesn’t have enough, which would have left me with goodness, but I don’t have enough of that, either. I don’t have leverage. I can’t tip the scale; instead, it catapults me into oblivion. The void engulfs my nothingness.

With tears rolling down my cheeks, I gathered my things and logged off the computer. I went to the bus stop and waited until the bus came, and I got on. Do you remember? I was so, so mad, and I was on the bus, and I was so preoccupied I missed my stop, but I snapped out of it in time to get off at the next stop and walk up to my apartment. I went into my room and closed the door and turned on my laptop. With a clenched jaw and a fresh supply of tears, I sent a courtesy email. I climbed into my bed and pulled the covers over my head and slept until I woke up with a compounded headache. I went to dinner with friends feeling bad for being so distracted, but lightning storms and free ice cream helped me feel better. Interestingly, so did talking about the apocalpyse and Prop 8.

That last bit is what I’d like most to remember. You know, lightning and ice cream and conversation. I’m really grateful for my friends.

A Few from the Fashion Show

So these guys were across the room. Two rows of chairs were in front of them. Two rows were also in front of me, and the runway was between us.

Before the show begins, the DJ plays some really good dance music, and I sway and nod my head to the music. I was already paying a good bit of attention to these guys, partly because they’re attractive, but also because their body language caught my eye.

I’m taking a few shots with my camera, which isn’t inconspicuous. I happen to be shooting something in the same direction of these guys, Ben and Dallin. Ben, the blond, makes eye contact, and he thinks I’m taking a picture of him.

A few moments later another fun song plays and Ben and I dance in our chairs and we smile at each other.

Every once in a while we look at each other and shrug. Once, I point to my watch and he agrees we’ve been waiting a while.

He points to my hat and mouths that he likes it. I’m wearing my fedora. Of course he likes it.

The show begins. Quite a few interesting and very artistic designs.

The show ends. Staff starts putting away chairs to get ready for the after-party. I walk over to where the guys are standing, and we introduce ourselves.

We chitchat for a while, then we both split off to rejoin our groups.

Then I dance with my friends for a while.

Then one of my friend’s car gets towed.

Then we go to the towing company where I want to release some sort of violence.

We retrieve the friend’s car.

We go to my place to decompress a little. Warm up. Talk.

Eventful evening, to say the least.

I hope you weren’t expecting photos of the actual fashion show.