dr. friend: so i don’t think i’m particularly cool with this whole not being able to chat with you
me: yeah, no kidding
i’m a jerk
dr. friend: you should really work on that
me: hell no
it’s your problem
dr. friend: lol
me: 😉
dr. friend: i mean, no texting or anything
me: i know, right?
dr. friend: sheesh
[top secret stuff]
dr. friend: ahhhh
so when do you return?
me: [shh]
dr. friend: okay.
me: don’t worry, it’s before your birthday
dr. friend: brb…i gotta tell the dept of homeland sec “something”
lol me: haha
i’m going to bring a longform birth certificate from senegal
it was never kenya
dr. friend: hahaha
me: i bought some dramamine and pepto
dr. friend: imodium?
me: no
dr. friend: buy some
me: yeah?
dr. friend: if you get the traveler’s diarrhea, imodium plus the azithromycin
me: i like doctor friends
dr. friend: seriously.
lol
and you know not to brush your teeth with the water too, right?
me: yeah. keeping the mineral water by the sink
using that for washing hands before contact lens insertion, too
dr. friend: good
and i don’t know that i’d do much wading in streams barefoot
me: you can look at all my parasites when i come back
dr. friend: hahahahah
[a friend] showed me a pic of a dude’s parasites once. dude had brought them to the office
me: what
dr. friend: yeah
people bring weird crap in
like their bedbugs in a jar
me: why?
dr. friend: so i can see them
mucus too. it’s an awesome job
me: you love it!
dr. friend: lol
most of the time
dr. friend: hey, good news
the worm i was concerned about, the guinea worm has been eradicated from senegal
me: did they put it back in guinea?
dr. friend: lol
me: i’m glad i don’t have to worry about that
dr. friend: yeah
me too
it’s pretty gross
me: would you be okay signing for a crate with a monkey in it?
it would be for your birthday
dr. friend: oh sure
me: what color?
dr. friend: it would need to be trained as a butler first
we’ve always wanted a monkey butler, you know
any color, as long as it’s trained. i’m no racist.
me: do you like cufflinks for the monkey tux?
dr. friend: it would be nice, not necessary though
i’d be happy to dress the monkey
me: okay, that works
dr. friend: so do you have to wear a head scarf or anything?
me: no, but i do think we have to dress special for when we visit a mosque
dr. friend: probably long skirt/covered arms/head
me: yes
i should pack those
dr. friend: lol
me: do you like mangoes?
dr. friend: omg yeah
you should send me a bunch
me: i’m afraid the monkey will be easier
dr. friend: lol
you could um, smuggle them in your clothing?
me: i could risk growing a cup size or four
dr. friend: hee
me: [la la la]
dr. friend: [confirm la la la]
[husband] says you’re going to get lots of marriage proposals
me: SWEET
dr. friend: in senegal. they seem to enjoy foreign women
me: yeah, i KNOW not here
dr. friend: lol, not what i meant
me: (i know 🙂 )
dr. friend: lol
of course, with the whole muslim thing, you might be looking at quite a different life for yourself
me: maybe i can find one who practices animalism
dr. friend: there ya go
me: or one of the 4% of the catholic population
dr. friend: see, now you’re thinking
me: haha
dr. friend: so you leave [cuckoo!]
me: true
me: did you turn down your invitation [to the royal wedding]?
dr. friend: yeah…decided on iceland instead
me: priorities
dr. friend: yup
me: do you play portal?
dr. friend: no
me: okay, just wondering
dr. friend: what is it?
oh crap, have i gotten old?
me: it’s a video/computer game
dr. friend: oh
dr. friend: so old
me: i hear ya
dr. friend: woops
me: ha. huh?
dr. friend: i accidentally got off this page
me: ah. okay
i’m so flattered that you’re going to miss me
dr. friend: totally
me: will you say hi to björk when you go to iceland?
dr. friend: lol of course
i’ll send you one of her outfits
me: i would LOVE that
i’d wear it every day until the eggs hatch
dr. friend: unless you’d prefer that fermented shark’s head thing
lol
me: haha. eww
are you going to try to buy iceland?
dr. friend: not right now. we need a fence.
me: HAHAHA
priorities
dr. friend: yup
i heard a rumor that you designed kate’s dress
me: if it’s a cross between modest and yip-yip monster, then yes
dr. friend: that’s wild. so you’re going to senegal to avoid the press, right
me: yes. and to find a royal husband of my own
dr. friend: okay, i’m lame so i’m off to bed
me: good night lamey
dr. friend: have a good night! [dum dee dum dee dum]
me: thanks so much
dr. friend: get some imodium
me: yes’m
dr. friend: gnight!
A Little Thinking 