Just got off the phone with my brother. We were chatting along, the way we do. He asked me what my plans are for today. I told him I might try to fit in some sleep, as I awesomely put away another three hours last night. I was about to explain to him my body’s reaction to caffeine, but I sensed an urgency in his voice, so I clipped that thought and asked him if he needed to go. He said, “Well, yeah. But only because there are, like, 20 Asian women around me all of a sudden.” Then he laughed.

I’m pretty sure he was joking, but for some reason I’d imagined the scenario, and it became a very strong possibility in my mind. He was at work when he called. I mean, people stop by his work all the time. In fact, in June after the roadtrip, my mom and I pulled into his work so we all could go to dinner together, because I was leaving the next day to return to New York, and I wanted some Frank time. His friends pick him up to hang out because he doesn’t drive. So. 20 Asian women: why not?

Anyway, he is pretty busy at work, and I was pleasantly surprised he returned my call, even before 9:00 this morning. As we were winding up the call, he said he’d try to call me later, and I said that would be fine. Then we laughed, because we’re always laughing, and then he said, “Love you, just in case,” and that touched me, and I said, “Love you, too,” and then we said goodbye.

Sometimes I get scared that we’ll end a call and we won’t have told “I love you” to each other. It actually terrifies me, and my stomach knots just thinking about it. I could go on and on about that brother of mine, but I already have.

I hope I get to talk to him later.