May’s synopsis: It’s winter. It’s time to feature a song about depression.
May’s rating scale:
It’s a grey day. A steady rain showers the city, and traffic skis through the puddles. The air is heavy, thick. The sun doesn’t rise as early, and it sets sooner. It seems colors are muted, lights are dimmed; all that remains are the smoldering wicks of just barely snuffed candles. It’s very easy to feel depressed.
The grey, the darkness and gloom and suffocation are all one experiences when she is depressed. Meg Hutchinson masterfully presents and demonstrates the difference between depression and living a full, productive, present life. Depression is a place, but it isn’t only an institution where you’re committed. She won’t tell us where she’s been, because to retell is to relive, and she would rather talk about how it’s so good to be home. Depression isn’t home, and home isn’t only those four familiar walls with a roof on top.
She definitely knows who she was under ever cloudy skies and who she is now, and who she has to thank for helping her through the dark times. She’s become healthy again; enough time and experience (and perhaps medication) has healed her, and she’s using her experience to reach out to those who might relate, to create awareness, to let others know they’re not alone. Depression affects everyone. Did you go there too? Was it dark for you? Were you thinking self-destructively? Were you a patient or a loved one? Did you wait there too? Did you find a cure, too? The world might pale and darken, she knows, as you may know. But, it gets better.
I love this song, because it’s about getting better. It’s a song about overcoming this particular hardship. The tune is catchy, especially the chorus, and it rings repeatedly throughout the song, like a mantra. “I’ve been getting better these days. I’ve been sleeping in my own bed again”: Life is new, life is hers and is no longer as much of a struggle with a clouded perspective and heavy heart. “I’ve been dreaming in full color”: Can you imagine, colors popping in your dreams, the world coming alive around you? “Goodbye sorrow, I’ve found another way to stay”: Another way to deal with sadness. Another way to stay home. It’s so good.
Here’s the song. Hover over the link, then press “play” in the pop-up, or just let it download. Lyrics below.
I won’t tell you where I’ve been
Only that it’s so good to be home
It’s possible to go so far down
As some of you might already know
Did you go there too?
I won’t tell you what I’ve seen
Only that this world can be so mean
Brave souls shuffling up and down the halls
No one visits no one even calls
Did you wait there too?
But I’ve been getting better these days
And I’ve been sleeping in my own bed again
And I’ve been dreaming in full color
Goodbye sorrow I’ve found another
I won’t tell you what I would’ve done
If not for my dearest ones
Chemistry can sorta leave you in the lurch
I’m just glad they found a cure
Did you find one too?
But if the world should really pale
Dark night of the soul is real
Let me offer I’ve been there
And one day that darkness clears